Joneses – 2.2 Oh No She Didn’t

“…and then she was like, ‘we’re watching our calories.’ How rude! I mean, who says that?!”

It had been one week since Eliza met the Joneses, and she was still stewing over Mary declining her gift.

“Good heavens,” Asia said. “Well, I’m sure she didn’t mean anything by it. Maybe…maybe someone has a health issue she was trying to keep covered? You know everyone seems to be gluten intolerant these days.”

“Hmph! Gluten shmooten! She is just plum rude and fake as freezer bunny poop!”

Asia laughed heartily. “Oh, Eliza! You’re so colorful when you’re all worked up. I’m sure Mrs. Jones is a lovely person. Maybe she was nervous or something.”

“She’s compensating for something, and I’m gonna figure out what!”

“Eliza…don’t you dare pull out any cop tricks on our new neighbors. Give them a chance,” Asia warned.

“I do what I have to do to keep our neighborhood safe and free of gossip column fodder! As president of this homeowners association—

“Your job is to simply make sure we stay informed of neighborhood happenings and to cultivate an environment that makes this place somewhere people want to live.” Asia smiled mischievously and went back to eating her lunch. Every now and then she needed to remind Eliza to not take her role so seriously. Unfortunately, Eliza never listened.