8.74 Hypothetically Speaking

Julian and Jeannette were hanging out one evening–as they often did–and were cloud gazing in the park–as they often did. Although Julian desperately wanted a girlfriend, there was something about Jeannette that he couldn’t get enough of, and he always ended up spending time with her instead. When asked about it, he always said it was because they were best friends, and that’s what best friends do, but everyone knew that was baloney.

“Do you want to have children, Jeannette?”

She tried not to get excited about where this conversation could go although she was leaping for joy inside.

“Of course,” she replied casually.

“Me too.”

They lay silently for a few minutes and listened to the birds and feeling the cool breeze run across their faces. Julian revisited the subject.

“You know what I want to do?”

“What’s that?”

“I want to name my kids after me, but I never really liked the whole junior thing. If I have a daughter, I’m gonna name her after me.”

“Juliana?”

“Juliette!”

“Awww, that’s precious, Julian! I actually want to do the same thing.”

“Yeah? What’s your daughter’s name going to be? Jeannine?”

“Janessa.”

“Cute. I’m hungry. You wanna grab some food?”

“Sure.”

They got up from their resting place and found a plate of burgers on the edge of the park. This conversation got Jeannette’s mind racing. He confused her. He said that he only saw her as a friend, but yet he spent all his time with her. And, of course, all the flirting he did drove her crazy. Did he actually like her and didn’t know how to show it, or was he just a flirt? She had to find out, but covertly. Her first black ops mission was to plant subtle seeds. To do that, she revisited this topic of children.

“So,” she began, “hypothetically speaking…if you and I had children, what are we gonna do about these names? I’m not giving up mine, and I know you’re not giving up yours.”

“Hmmm…,” he thought. “Well…I guess we’ll have to have hypothetical twins!”

“Twins?? You’re trying to make my hypothetical hair turn gray before I’m 30!”

“Ok, fine. I guess you’ll have to plan on being pregnant at least three times then…hypothetically.”

“Three times? Who is this third child?”

“Our son,” he said very matter-of-factly.

“Oh! Right…your hypothetical heir.”

“No! The heir isn’t hypothetical. He’s very real. You know how my family works.”

“This hypothetical family is getting large.”

“That’s what happens when two stubborn people hypothetically get married,” he said amorously.

She was trying not to get sucked in, but she couldn’t help it. She was on a mission, and you can’t bring your personal feelings on the battlefield. But, this mission was personal, and she found herself gazing into his eyes longing for something to happen between them.

Dangit, Jeannette, she thought. Why’d you have to go and do this to yourself??

She looked away and went back to her food to distract herself before getting back on topic.

“So…your, I mean our son…what’s his name then?”

“Something that starts with J but ends in ‘ehn’ like Julian, Owen, Brandon…”

“Jonathan!”

“Jonathan! That’s great, Jeannette! I love it. You just named the generation nine heir of the Pruett legacy!”

“Yes…yes I did,” she said with pride.

“Our hypothetical children are going to be the most gorgeous children in the neighborhood! I mean…I’m cute, and you’re beautiful…the kids are bound to be knockouts.”

Gosh! I hate it when he says I’m beautiful! It makes this even harder!

Suddenly, Jeannette thought of something and shouted, “Hey! You know what? Juliette could also be a nice a mashup of Julian and Jeannette. Isn’t that cool? Or, does that mess it up for you in real life?”

“Jumping freezer bunnies!! That IS cool! I didn’t even think of that.”

Of course you didn’t…plumhead!

“Well,” he continued, “I suppose I’ll just have to be reminded of you every time I call her name then. Hey! You can be her godmother!”

I hope he’s haunted by that name if we don’t get married for real! Come to think of it…I had better be married myself before this happens. It’ll be tortured if I’m not.

“Awwww, Julian! I would love to be your daughter’s godmother!”

Jeannette’s plan worked. This whole hypothetical situation was fun for Julian, but the Juliette conversation kind of got his mind wandering a bit. He never considered a future with her before–outside of their friendship–but the idea wasn’t terribly off-putting for him. He wasn’t sold on it, but it was an idea nonetheless.

“Wow. Julian, Jeannette, Juliette, Janessa, and Jonathan. What a beautiful little family!”