24.9 The Debriefing

The conversation with Susie put things into perspective, and Mary arose the next day with a sense of purpose. Still, she mourned for her son’s young life and wasted potential. Depression lurked in every corner waiting to pounce. But, one child could not stop the show. She was no Mother of the Year, but Mary Mother of Tim, Susie, and Phoenix was back in full effect.

With the girls gone, the silence was like fertile ground for scattered emotions to plant seeds of doubt; Mary fought hard against it. Luckily, Asia came over.

“She lives,” Asia shouted.

“I’m so glad you’re here,” Mary said, exhaling in relief. “I could use a distraction.”

“Distraction you say? I haven’t heard from you in days. I’d say you’ve been very distracted. Your island weekend must have been epic!”

Mary hid a smirk as she walked Asia into the living room. She was so right and completely wrong.

“Sooooo, how did it go?” Asia swooned, sitting on her leg preparing for juicy gossip.

Asia was the only person with whom Mary shared deep feelings about Reed. Girl-talk was new. Was it proper to share what happened on the island? Did sharing break some relationship code? Asia wasn’t a gossip queen, so maybe there was no harm. As much as she wanted to tiptoe into the uncharted waters of friendship, the family news took precedence.

She cleared her throat. “Something has happened, Asia.”

“Good heavens! You’re pregnant?”

Mary didn’t know whether to laugh, be offended, or ignore that reply. “Asia, please. I’m being serious.”

“So am I! Pregnancy at our age is serious.”

Mary couldn’t help but chuckle at her friend’s assumption. “I’m not pregnant.” At least she better not be. Phoenix was a living example of how sometimes unexpected things happened. What a beautiful surprise she was. “Something has happened in our family.”

“Oh. Thank goodness. Is everything all right?”

How did one bear terrible news to a friend? Asia wouldn’t judge, but it was still so upsetting. “Eliza called Monday night…”

Asia’s eyebrows furrowed. The anticipation was as thick as fog.

“Tim was arrested.”

“Good heavens. Oh, Mary. I’m so sorry!”

“I’ve blamed myself. But, whether my actions contributed to Tim’s behavior or not, I can’t drown in my sorrows anymore.”

“That’s so good to hear.” Asia shook her head. “Mothers are such gluttons for punishment. It’s like we need to blame someone, and we’re such easy targets.”

Mary chuckled. “When does it end?”

Asia snorted. “Probably never. We can’t control what our children do. We can only attempt to influence their decisions. But, from there, it’s on them. I’ve been learning that a lot lately.”

Such true words. Accepting them was difficult, but it didn’t make the statement any less true.

“So, how are the girls? And John?”

Mary sighed. “Oh, I don’t know. Phoenix dotes on me and thinks she is protecting me by not talking about it. Susie appears unaffected and alluded to previous suspicions. She’s back here now.”

“Oh! Well, that’s good…right?”

“Of course.”

“And, John?”

Mary’s jaw stiffened as blood bubbled to her ears. His hateful words still threatened to unleash the dragon. Those thoughts had to exist previously for them to slip out—if he truly slipped up. But, was it true? Though the guilt of breaking Reed’s heart still loomed, they were only teenagers. Could teen drama label her a harlot for the rest of her life? It wasn’t like she practiced that behavior with multiple suitors. Apart from kissing Reed a few times, she remained faithful to that jerk. He had no room to point fingers.

She cleared her throat. “John is not my concern anymore. That is all I care to say.”

“Sure. Of course. I’m sorry to bring him up.”

“It’s quite all right. This situation … It brought up many things. More like it brought out many things. I still live with guilt. I’ve concluded I cannot get over it or even begin to forgive myself while being controlled by him.”

“Oh, Mary. You’re such a strong woman.”

A quick grin flashed across her face. “I don’t feel very strong, but … Well, thanks.”

“You are! Look at all you’ve been through! All you suffered. Sure, you didn’t do everything right, and your life hasn’t gone even close to how you imagined, but you’ve lived such an amazing life! When you got divorced, you could have been like ‘woe is me,’ but you kept moving. You swallowed your pride and asked for help. You took a job, raised your child and ran this house all by yourself. And then, you opened yourself up to this amazing man. Now you have real love! Heh, if I were writing Susie’s book, I’d make you a hero!”

Mary’s cheeks warmed and eyes fell to the floor. Pressure built up behind her eyes, and she cleared her throat. “Well … Can I get you some tea?”

She dashed into the kitchen.